Amber Days 4

                                                                 Chapter 4

The taxi weaved it's way through the afternoon rush hour. Berta straightened her long red silk dress. The reflection of her face was one of a much younger Berta. Today, she was thirty years old and she was on the hunt. 

Strolling through the Metropole Bar on King Street, every head turned. Her hair was golden and fell in perfect waves down her back. 

An older man in his fifties winked at her. He approached her with his hands in his pockets, undressing her with his eyes. 

"What's your poison?"

She smiled and touched a long pendant that emphasised her cleavage. 

"White wine."

The bar tender poured their drinks and went back to polishing glasses.  

The man leaned against the bar. His wedding ring glinted in the reflection of her white wine. 

He threw back the single malt before touching her shoulder. 

"Come upstairs with me?"

She smiled and touched the pendant again.

"Show me the way."

Her hand loosened the tiny stopper on the pendant. It was going to be a great night. 

Amber Days 3

                                                                       Chapter 3

Berta peaked through the blinds in her bedroom. An ambulance was parked outside her neighbour's house. A stretcher was wheeling Joy into the ambulance. A limp arm slipped out from underneath a white sheet. 

She smiled and went back to bed. At noon, she ran a bath. Pulling her hair up, she applied make up and finished it off with red lipstick. She hung a long champagne coloured silk dress from the bathroom door and slid into a bubble bath. 

Twenty minutes later, Berta was in a taxi. At Brighton Palace Pier, she took her time walking towards a donut stand. With the hot treat in her hand, she walked all the way to the end of the pier. 

The wind wipped around her, creating goosebumps all over her body. She felt twenty years younger, and looked it too. 

After every kill, her body filled with energy.  A familiar body emerged next to her. Greta was her oldest friend and lover. 

Amber Days 2

            Chapter 2

Tea splattered on Berta's spotless table cloth. She winced at the clatter of a teaspoon on a saucer. The dust covering the top shelves in the living room made her itch.

"How do you like your tea?"

Joy Sheppard moved to L.A in the 50s with her husband who was hoping to be an actor. In the end, he became the head of the biggest advertising agency in California. 

"Mmm, it's good. Goes well with the digestives."

Berta pretended to like it and swallowed down the bitter drink. She preferred coffee. 

Every Thursday at around 4PM, they had tea at Berta's place. This time, Berta made her famous almond cookies. She helped herself to another digestive and shoved the tin towards Joy. Dunking it in the tea, she brought up the subject of her daughter Beth.

"Did Beth tell you about the date?"

Joy opened the tin before dunking the almond cookie in her cooling cup of tea. 

"Yes, she did, but I don't think she like Charles."

Berta sat up straighter at hearing the news. Charles was her eldest son, and her favourite. 

"Oh? What about him didn't she like?"

Joy's face drained of colour.

"I...I don't feel well. Maybe we can continue this next time."

Berta helped her up, her joints popping. 

"Of course. Take it easy Beth."

Amber Days 1

                     Chapter 1

"Berta Robinson, come to the desk."

A tall slim woman in a pale yellow dress shuffled over to the front desk.

"Nurse Ray, you got my pills?"

She laughed out loud. He winked at her and shuffled from foot to foot. His 400 lb figure were a weight on his joints.

"Your grandson is in the waiting room. Here, don't forget your medication."

She squeezed his hand.

"Thank you."

Taking the bag of pills, she found her grandson reading a poster on the wall. He turned around and looked at her. At the sight of her fragile figure, his stiff composure softened.

"Come on Grandma, the car is right at the front."

She followed him out into the too bright day, squinting all the way into the car. Berta lived in L.A for most of her life. The cheeriness of the sun evaded her. From her bag, she pulled out a pair of ancient Chanel sunglasses. 

The drive took longer than expected. 

"John, can you go to the store for me? Here's the list."

She settled down on a kitchen stool. A cupboard was open before her. 

"Sure, anything else?"

He exhaled the sentence almost annoyed at having to be stuck in traffic again.

"Oh yes, please get those almond cookies that I like."

"Okay. I'll be back as soon as I can. Call me if you need me."

He grabbed his car keys and walked out with a grimace. Berta reached for an old coffee can and pulled out a small jar. 

The amber glass gleamed in the watery sunlight. Her eyes lit up as she remembered familiar faces from her past. 

The Black Rose 10

                                                                      Chapter 10

Rosie threw her favourite clothes, a toothbrush and some skincare in a small overnight bag.

"I don't understand what happened to you Jane. You weren't like this when we were first dating."

"I...I..."

She followed her to the door not knowing what to say. When the door closed, she checked the news. 

In the kitchen, she grabbed a bag of three black roses from the fridge. She picked up her backpack by the sofa, opened the window and shimmied along over to a drain pipe. 

A bus puller over and she jumped in. At the clock tower, she got off and walked over to Lizzie's flat. A man with a bicycle wheeled his bike out. She slipped in after him. Jane pulled out a key with a batman keyring dangling from it. She turned the light on when the door swung shut behind her. 

A lamp at the far end of the living room turned on. DI York placed her gun on the coffee table. 

"It's very kind of you to bring me roses."

She approached the detective slowly. 

"You've got nothing on me."

Sweat rolled down the side of her face. York laughed out loud. 

"It's over Jane. Come clean now. There's no point in dragging it out."

She lunged for the gun aiming for the detective's head. A sound from the kitchen distracted her.

DI York kicked the gun out of her hand. DS Scott grabbed her arms and cuffed her.

"Jane Anne Smith, you are under arrest."

The Seer 8

                                                                        Chapter 8

Under the light of the full moon, Opal glowed. The kids who had survived sat in a circle. Jade and Art sat next to each other. Annie, Jeffrey and the new kid resisted opening their eyes in the bright silver moon. They were the six people who survived.

Opal shimmered blinking in and out of existence. The light expanded and swallowed the circle. It exploded into a billion sparks filling them with one bright opal for a heart.

The light sent out a flare to the other survivors, if there were any left. The light grew smaller and smaller until the only thing left was the pale glow of the moon. 

Opal opened her eyes.

"Thanks everyone, I think that was it."

Jeffrey stood up and carried on digging. The rest of them went to the beach. Jade unzipped one of two tents on the beach. She changed into a pair of blue shorts and a white tank top. Her stomach began to protrud. The future inside of her.

In the distance, bright opal lights danced before them, the only hope that's left in the world.

The Black Rose 9

                                                                           Chapter 9

DI York closed the door behind her. The florist confirmed her suspicion. She decided to walk while DS Scott drove in the light rain. Her dark blonde hair grew limper and wetter. Thoughts raced through her mind. When she got to the hospital's entrance, she rang her hair out. Scott was already there with two cups of steaming hot coffee. What a saviour. 

When they entered the familiar room, the bed they sought out was empty. A nurse was folding a blanket on top of the bed. 

"Nurse...," she sipped her coffee. 

"Verity," she smiled.

"Right, Nurse Verity, where is this patient?"

"She left."

The detectives looked at each other.

"Come on Scott, your car, right now."

The car sped towards Jane's flat in the centre of Brighton. Three loud bangs brought out her neighbours. DS Scott kicked at the door. It opened wide. A cold draft fluttered a few black petals from the floor to the open living room window.

The Black Rose 8

                                                                         Chapter 8

Unsolved Mysteries flashed up on the screen. Lizzie pressed next with a greasy finger. Popcorn spilt all over the floor as she reached over towards a bottle of red wine.

Keith, her black labrador jumped up on the table and knocked the bottle over. Luckily, most of it landed on her clothes. He sniffed at the small drops of wine staining the carpet.

"Keith! Look at what you've done!"

She stripped her clothes off and threw them into the washing machine. In the bedroom, she pulled on a pair of black leggings and a purple t-shirt with the word witch on it. 

In the kitchen, she grabbed a bottle of chocolate milk before settling down on the sofa.

Two episodes in, a knock on the door made her jump. Looking into the spy hole, she saw a detective's badge shoved up against the door. She opened the door a crack. DI York looked concerned. 

"Elizabeth Green?"

"Lizzie."

"Lizzie, can we come in?"

She eyed then up carefully before opening the door wide. DS Scott sneezed as he approached Keith. 

"Sorry, I'm allergic," he sniffed. 

"What's this about?"

Lizzie scooted across the sofa. DI York sat next to her.

"I'm sure you understand what happened to your friends."

Keith whined and rolled over to his side.

"How could I not?"

She wiped away a tear. DS Scott added in.

"We were concerned for your safety," he sneezed again.

"I'm glad you thought of me."

She turned to Keith when he started throwing up. 

"Keith? Are you alright?" 

Lying down next to him, she stroked him.

DI York noticed the bottle of wine.

"Lizzie, is this a recent bottle of wine?"

"No, it was from Amy's birthday party."

York sniffed at the bottle. A faint smell of almonds pulled her away from it.

"Did you drink any of it?"

She looked around for a bag. In the cupboard next to oven, she pulled open two freezer bags. 

"No, Keith jumped on the table and knocked it all over me."

Lizzie started cleaning up the vomit. DS York placed the bottle in one bag and the vomit tissues in the other. 

"Where are your clothes?"

York looked around the room and noticed Keith weezing. 

"What's wrong with him?"

She bent down and sniffed his breath.

"They're in the washing machine. He licked a drop of wine on the carpet. What are you doing?"

Lizzie sat up and crossed her legs. 

"I think you need to take him to the vet right now!"

Keith vomited again and his eyes rolled up into his head.

"Keith!"

The Seer 7

                Chapter 7

Tom vomited for the third time that day. The sickness spread so fast. There was barely any time left to bury the kids before the next one died. 

Jeffrey dug the graves while the rest of the adults buried the dead. Jade and Art locked the rest of the healthy kids in their rooms.

Opal, Jane, the boy and his dog stopped dead in their tracks. Annie ran to them. 

"It spread so fast! Don't come in!"

Opal grabbed her arm when she tried to go back inside.

"Wait, Annie. Stay with us. Where's Jeffery?"

She turned towards his figure digging and digging and digging. Opal closed her eyes. She took a deep breath. 

"It's time for the property to fulfill it's self."

The Black Rose 7

                                                               Chapter 7

Amelia's husband and their two children were silent at what DI York has told them.

"Poison? But who would do that?"

DI York swallowed back the dregs of her coffee cup. 

"Yes, Mr Moore. The coroner confirmed it."

He sobbed into his hands, comforted by his kids.

DS Scott barged in. He pulled DI York up to her feet.

"We've got another one."

In the chaos of the hospital, Jane was unconscious in a bed in A&E. Nurses and doctors rushed around her. One of the nurses shouted, "she's breathing!"

The chaos died down and she was wheeled into a room with three other patients. 

Life After Lockdown

   In the thick of a fire, it's hard to see a way out. The smoke obscures our vision. The heat pushing the walls in. The flames lick at our skin, singing eyebrows and choking the life out of us. On this blue planet, life carries on no matter what happens. We keep spinning in the vast realm of space. Infinite. Seamless. It seems as humans, we're so used to going back to the way things were after a tragedy. Maybe that's a way life keeps us going in the comfort of what is so familiar. 

   COVID-19 has changed our lives forever. Lockdown has made me look at my life with a microscope. It made the most important things in my life, the things that I love to do, the things that wake me up at 2:00 AM to write down ideas for the book I'm writing stand out like a big bright lit up sign that says, 'TURN LEFT HERE!' and  'FOCUS ON WHAT YOU LOVE DOING.' The urge to write feels like a seduction. A strong urge to write poetry, short stories and books. 

   Living through a pandemic feels so unbelievable. It's horrific and almost apocalyptic. As lockdown eases, it feels hopeful. Shops and restaurants are opening back up. The summer haze makes it seem like it's over. When I see people traveling abroad, it makes me think of how the virus might be travelling from place to place, how people are still getting sick and they are still dying. It's like little fires starting at random and before you know it, a giant flame sweeps through like a bad nightmare. Talking about nightmares, yes, they were back. 

   The tragedy of people losing their jobs, shops closing, violence and looting during lockdown and now as things ease up feels like a sinking ship with her passenger aboard. The anti-racism rallies that started in America and swept through most of the cities in the world is a spark of hope after the unjust violence from the police. 

   As I'm coming out of furlough, going back to work next week feels good. I'm grateful that I still have my job. At the same time, my heart hurts at the amount of people who have lost their jobs. Things can never be the same, however it may seem. Going forward, I do hope the world changes for the better as the pandemic dies off. 

Take care, be safe and wash your hands,

Wonder Woman XXX

The Seer 6

                                                                           Chapter 6

   "Why are you here?"

   

   The old lady's husband held the shotgun at Jane's head. 

   "We need food, medical supplies, look your wife said that we can have three chicken. So can we take them and go?"

   He finally lowered the gun.

   "Oh, go on. Don't let me see your faces around here again."

   Opal pulled Jane up and they ran out with three chicken in the back of the truck.

   "I'll grab the steering wheel, you do the rest."

   Opal felt guilty about the gunshot wound. Her vision never failed her. 

   They stopped at the pharmacy. It seemed empty. Opal tried the door handle. It was open. There was a faint smell of disinfectant mixed with dust and lipstick. The old fashioned kind.

   She grabbed a green basket and emptied as many shelves as she could. In a second basket, she filled it with skincare.

   A German Shepherd growled at her when she made her way to the door. A boy no older than ten years old stopped in his tracks when he saw Opal.

   "It's you!"

   She blinked at him. Dropping the baskets, she closed her eyes. The dog stopped growling and went to his owner.

   "You may come with us."

   She picked up the baskets and walked out with the boy and his dog.

   

The Black Rose 6

                                                                     Chapter 6

   DI York parked her Audi across the street from Jane's flat. The windows were curtainless. She dug out her binoculars. The TV was on. Jane was watching Pretty Little Liars. 

   York zoomed in on the coffee table. A bowl of popcorn was over flowing. Next to her, Rose was whispering into her ear. They laughed and munched on more popcorn. 

   In a house on a hill, Amelia was taking vodka shots with her husband. The kids were fast asleep. They laughed quietly before kissing each other. She pushed him back and gripped the edge of the kitchen table.

   A persistent knock on the door drew her husband's attention away from her. She collapsed on the floor and vomited. The door banged open. DS Scott barged in. 

   "Who are you?"

   Her husband bent down to help her. She was shaking violently before clutching her chest and passing out.

   "I'm a detective, here's my badge. Call 999!"

   He performed CPR, but he couldn't save her. There was no pulse. Her husband threw up in the sink just as the ambulance arrived. 

The Seer 5

                                                                      Chapter 5

   In the distance, Opal seemed to shimmer in the heat. Her brown eyes became molten when she  recalled a time when life seemed simple. A time when she was a part of a family. She didn't cry anymore. It was time to be a leader.

   Climbing into the front seat, Jane slammed the door shut and turned the engine on. She was one of two grown ups who could drive. At the age of twenty, she and her two younger sisters were the only survivors in their family.

   "Ready Opal?"

   "Ready Jane."

   Opal closed her eyes. 

   "Where to?"

   "Just keep driving. I'll let you know when we get there." 

   The engine whirred in an ancient blue truck. Images flashed through her mind. A petrol station. Deserted homes. An abandoned farm.

   "Stop at the farm around the corner from the pharmacy.

   "OK."

   Supplies were running low. They need tinned food, medicine and more petrol. Jane pulled a pair of black Ray Bans from the glove box. She put them on and hummed the song One Kiss by Dua Lipa. Opal opened her eyes. Anxiety plagued her when they pulled up by the barn. There was no sign of life except for half a dozen chicken pecking on the ground at the back of the house.

   "Something's not right."

   Opal felt like they were being watched. They jumped out looking for the cause of her anxiety. In the house, everything was covered with a thick layer of dust. Jane got to the kitchen and started searching through the cupboards. 

   The creak of the back door made her stop. A gruff voice demanded that she turn around. A tall thin woman with skin the colour of leather pointed a shotgun at her. 

   Who the hell are you? "

   "I'm. .."

   Opal stormed into the kitchen.

   "Lady, drop the gun."

   She pointed it at her. Jane stood between them.

   "She's only a girl. We're only here for supplies."

   The woman aimed the gun at her forehead. 

   "Get out of here!"

   Her arms shook and the gun went off injuring Jane in the thigh.

   "Ah!"

   She fell to the ground with both hands on her left thigh. Opal went up to the woman.

   "We have kids to feed. What can you give us?"

   The woman collapsed in a chair. She held her head between her hands.

   "The chicken, you can have three."

   "Thank you. What about medicine?"

   The woman shook her head. The front door swung shut. An old man in blue overalls dropped a bag he was carrying.

   "Irma, what did you do?"

   He picked up the shotgun and aimed it at Jane. Opal lifted her up.

   "We were just leaving."

   They walked two steps towards the door.

   "No you don't."

   

The Black Rose 5

                                                                          Chapter 5

   Claire's heart pendant lay in an evidence bag on DI York's desk. Amelia and her two kids Leah eight and John 6, were sharing a chair. 

   "What do you mean it's a homicide? 

   "I mean, she didn't die of natural causes. Now please answer my question. Where did you get that bottle of rosé from? 

   She blew her nose and fixed her pony tail in her reflection on the desk lamp.

   "I got it from Waitrose."

   "Right."

   She stood up. 

   "Is that all?"

   DI York stood up too.

   "One more question. Where were you on the night that Claire died?"

   "I was on a date night with my husband. You want to know what else we did that night?"

   The detective folded her arms before speaking.

   "If you can remember what else happened on the night of the party, that would be helpful."

   Amelia pulled her bag over her shoulder. 

   "Sure, I'll remember to call you if I do. Come on kids, dad's got ice cream."

   She flicked her pony tail at DI York on her way out.

Three Books I Finished Reading

Here are three books that I finished reading. I really enjoyed them and loved Frankenstein, Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde.

The Seer 4

                 Chapter 4

   A bonfire roared in the middle of a circle. Laughter and music brightened the young faces who were eating the last of the harvest.

   Annie placed a plate with a single tangerine in front of Opal. With so many mouths to feed, there was very little to go around.

   "Opal, your tangerine is here."

   She placed her hand on the fruit. 

   "Thank you Annie. Are you enjoying the harvest dinner?" 

   She pulled a blue knitted blanket around her shoulders.

   "It's the best harvest ever!"

   She kissed her on the cheek.

   The fire pulled her attention to the dancing flames. Through what little vision she had, light and shadows were her world.

   A couple of older kids ran off into the school. Jade and Art locked the door in the makeshift clinic. Art pulled her into a corner and they started kissing. Jade pushed him away and started going threw the drawers.

   "Come on Art, help me find it."

   He kissed her.

   "In a minute."

   She pushed him away again and started crying. 

   "Why aren't you taking it seriously? I'm terrified, Art. I need you right now." 

   He pulled her close.

   "I'm sorry, I'm also scared. We'll be OK as long as we're together. I'll help you look for it."

   Looking through all the drawers, he found a box of two pregnancy tests.

   "Here, I'll wait for you."

   She grabbed the box and hurried into the bathroom next door. A few minutes later, she walked back in.

   "We have a wait for three minutes "

   "OK."

   Art held her close. At seventeen, he didn't expect to be a father. He was grateful that they were atleast the same age.

   "It's time."

   She flipped the test over. Two lines made her cry. His emotions confused him. He was happy, really happy. Pulling away, he kissed Jade again.

 

  "It's OK Jade. I'll look after you, after us."

   "Us?"

   "Yes, we're a family now."

   She smiled brightly. They placed a hand on her flat stomach.

The Black Rose 4

                                                                         Chapter 4

                                                                           Claire

   DI York covered her mouth with a handkerchief and used a pen to lift up Claire 's upper lip. A black rose was in her mouth. She stumbled backwards and threw up in the toilet bowl.

   DS Scott handed her a tissue.

   "Come on Hannah, get some fresh air with me."

   "Alright."

   They walked along the pavement breathing in as much fresh air as possible. 

   "I see you noticed the black rose."

   She retched at the thought of the smell. 

   "Yes, didn't the last case have a black rose too?"

   They headed into Sainsbury's. 

   "She did, the coroner is about to release the cause of death."

   After paying for a couple of bottles of water, they returned to DS Scott's car parked across the street from Claire 's flat. 

   DI York lit a cigarette and took a long drag. She looked at Sarah's file. 

   "Both female, both black roses. They were friends. Perhaps a common enemy?"

   "Perhaps."

The Seer 3

                                                                 Chapter 3

A handful of lavender was being pummelled in a mortar. Annie passed me a small muslin bag. She filled it with the ground lavender and tied the top.

"Tom, smell this. "

Tom's breath was ragged. When he started smelling the lavender, his breathing calmed down. 

"Keep it under your pillow. "

He nodded.

"Thanks Opal."

She hugged him before picking him up and laying him down on the bed. 

"Rest for now and we'll talk during the sharing circle. OK?"

"OK. See you later Opal."

It was hard to look at him with that haunted look on his face. Most of the kids had this look.

"Come on Annie, let's prepare for the harvest dinner."

The Black Rose 3

                                                                      Chapter 3

                      

                                                                        Claire

Claire perched her laptop on a chair near the bathtub. She tapped on season one of the Big Bang Theory. She slipped into a bubble bath with candles and pink rose petals. 

Today was the first anniversary of Terry 's death. She clutched a bottle of half drunk rosé from the floor and gulped the rest down. The bottle floated on the bubbles before bubbling on the way down to the bottom.

She slid down and closed her eyes. A deep sob broke out of her and she cried out loud, her face streamed with snot and mascara. 

Her breathing became shallow and her heart slowed down. When her throat constricted, she tried to grab the sides of the tub, but she hit her head and lost consciousness. 

The Seer 2

                                                                     Chapter 2

I peeled a tangerine breathing in the citrus tang. The wind was high. It blew sand around abandoned beach huts along the seashore.

After the last war, something was triggered to cause the earth to turn into a dust ball. Most people died. Only ten thousand survived. In Indigo Beach, the population has risen from three hundred to eight hundred. 

Most of the survivors were children and young adults. We live in an abandoned school called Indigo High. The classrooms were turned into bedrooms and the gym into a large living room. The teenagers turned the basement into a club with flashing lights and a long bar on the far side of the wall. 

A couple of the older kids dubbed by everyone as 'the twins' were setting  up a barbecue under the roof of a half collapsed beach hut. 

"Opal! It's time for the harvest!"

Annie, one of a hundred five year olds, pulled me towards the green houses. I gave her the rest of my tangerine.

"Let's go."

Two green houses were set up at the back of the school on the football field. When we got there, barrels were filled with squashes, carrots and potatoes. Jeffrey was one of the older kids. He built the green houses and started growing plants. His father had a working farm.

"Hey Jeffrey, it looks like a great harvest."

"Hi Opal, thank God for composting."

"Do you need any help?"

The thought of butternut squash soup made me salivate.

"No, Ronnie has been a big help. Thanks for stopping by."

"Good job Jeffrey. See you later."

Before leaving, I picked up a pot of lavender. 

"Opal! Opal!"

I turned around but didn't see anyone. Once in the school, I found Tom hyperventilating in the corner of his room.

"It's OK Tom, I'm here. Take a few deep breaths. Annie, run to the kitchen and grab a pestal and mortar. "

The Black Rose 2

                                                                         Chapter 2

                                                                            Jane

Jane placed a single white rose on Sarah's coffin. She stepped back and the coffin was lowered down into the earth. 

Her boots sunk into the rain soaked grass. There was no one left at the cemetery. During the funeral, she hung back watching from a distance as her friends sobbed over their dead friend.

Rain started to fall, distracting her from her misery.

"Miss, the cemetery is closing."

The undertaker had a permanent scowl on his face.

"Oh, sorry. I'm just leaving."

She looked up and the sky had gone from grey and blue to grey and blood orange.

Later that night, Jane soaked in the bathtub, and scrubbed blood from under her nails. 

The Seer 1

                                                                         Chapter 1

I never thought that the smell of freshly cut grass would take me back to a time when summer days felt infinite, when the sun felt divine on my skin and when a snow ball fight at 1:00AM filled me with delight.

The murmur of people in the next room brought me back too soon. I opened my eyes to a woman quietly sobbing into her sleeve. A stool was placed in front of me. I stepped on it and waited for silence to take over. A still lake quivered in my mind. I stretched my hands and placed them on top of the crying woman's head.

Images of a man's bleeding body face down on a wooden floor filled my senses. The images flickered. The lake was still again. I opened my eyes to a figure of the same man standing next to her. 

"He's here. He's standing next to you."

The woman stopped crying. 

"Is he OK?"

I smiled and dropped my hands down.

"Yes. He's fine. He wants to tell you that he'll always be with you."

She stood up and bowed down to me.

"Thank you. Thank you so much."

"You're welcome, Jennifer." 

A shock registered on her face. She left quickly almost tripping on her dress.

I jumped off the stool and took it with me through to a blue kitchen. A large window overlooked what used to be the Blue Forest. It used to be so dense that no one has ever successfully hiked through it. Everyday, hikers would be found lost wondering around in circles. 

Now, it's a desert. Dunes replaced what used to be a coniferous forest. Nobody knows why it happened. Everybody knows how it happened. Today, all that matters is that we're alive. Today I'm a year older. Nobody expected that a nine year old would save the world.

The Black Rose 1

                                                               

Chapter 1

 

Sarah

 

   She was late. Again. Clutching a bottle of prosecco, she pressed the buzzer. A chirpy “Who is it?” made her heart beat fast.

   “It’s Sarah.”

   A click sounded and she pulled the front door open. Three flights of steps later, she finally arrived at 31A. The door opened blasting her with Usher’s Yeah. Amelia greeted her with a wide friendly smile.

   “Sarah! Come in!”

   “Thanks.”

   She placed the bottle on the coffee table. Claire greeted her with a bear hug.

   “I’m so glad you came. We didn’t think you’d make it.”

   “Sorry I’m late.”

   “I know. Do you want Prosecco or Bailey’s?”

   “Prosecco would be good. Thanks.”

   Claire passed her a cool bubbly glass. She sat next to Jane.

   “Hi Jane. How are you?”

   “I’m good. Thanks,” she frowned.

   “Are you sure?”

   “Yeah, I’m fine,” she looked down at her black boots.

   Sarah removed her denim jacket and downed the whole glass.

   “Jane, what’s wrong?”

   “Nothing.”

   “I’m trying to help you.”

   “Really? Help me? Why don’t you ask yourself what help you need?”

   Sarah stood up, nostrils flaring and hands on her hips. Jane stood up and stepped back.

   “Fuck off Jane. I’m trying to help you. Why are you behaving this way?”

   Jane moved a few steps forward.

   “Because you keep talking behind my back, that’s why!

   Claire hurried towards us, blonde hair fanning behind her. Her heart pendant swayed back and forth.

   “Girls! Stop fighting! This is a celebration.”

   She looked at us with that resting bitch face we’re all used to.

   “Fine!”

   Jane flopped down clutching a cushion. Sarah flailed her arms around whispering to Claire. She ignored the person sitting next to her. A hot seething anger ran through her body. Flash backs of happier times with Sarah replaced her anger with deep sadness. A warm arm wrapped around her shoulders.

   “Alright Janey?”

   Lizzie smiled compassionately. Her purple hair and nose ring made her look instantly cool.

   “No, not really, but I’ll be alright.”

   “If you need to talk, let me know.”

   “Thanks Lizzie.”

   A chocolate cake with a single candle emerged from behind the sofa. Claire started singing happy birthday and we all joined in.

   “Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday dear Amelia, happy birthday to you!”

   Sarah filled everyone’s glass and drank the rest of the prosecco from the bottle. We clinked glasses and took a few sips. Claire passed around slices of cake on napkins. Jane moved over to sit on a sofa parallel to the one she was sitting on.

   “What’s it like to be thirty, Amy?”

   “Right now, it’s pretty good.”

   She smiled warmly.

   “Jane, are you free tomorrow?”

   “I might be. I’ll ask Rose if still wants to go to the cinema.”

   Her brown eyes lit up.

   “What film are you going to watch?”

   “The new Emma film. It has really good reviews.”

   “OH! I love Emma, well, if you are free in the day, come and join us for a roast.”

   “When are you going?”

   “Not sure yet, bring Rose with you.”

   “OK.”

   Sarah ran to the bathroom and threw up. Claire ran after her.

   “Sarah! Are you OK?”

   She held her hair away from her face.

   “Too much prosecco. I’ll be fine.”

   “What do you need?”

   “A greasy burger and a coke?”

   She half joked and threw up.

   “Tell me where you want to get it and I’ll go.”

   “You’re too kind. No, don’t worry about it. I’ll get some on the way home.”

   Claire grabbed a pink towel from the rail and wrapped it around her shoulders.

   “OK, let me know if you need anything.”

   She smiled weakly.

   “Will do.”

   The celebrations carried on for the next couple of hours with more drinking and more pizzas being ordered. Claire peaked her head into the bathroom.

   “How are you doing?”

   “I can’t stop throwing up and my stomach hurts. I think I’m going home.”

   “Do you want me to call you a taxi?”

   “That would be great Claire.”

   “Calling one now.”

   She pulled her phone from her back pocket and dialled 20 40 60. Amelia joined the crowd in the bathroom.

   “How are you feeling Sarah?”

   “Not so good.”

   Amelia popped her head back in.

   “The taxi is here. Get better Sarah”

   Jane peaked in too and plastered on a smile.

   “I hope you get better.”

   Sarah eyed her up coldly.

   “Thanks Jane.”

   The party disintegrated when Sarah left. Jane and Lizzie shared a taxi. Claire was picked up by her husband.

 

   Sunday was a warm day with a cool breeze blowing through the Windmill pub. Claire, Amelia, Lizzie and Jane ordered their roasts. Claire and Amelia ordered G and Ts, while Jane and Rose sipped on Mojitos. Lizzie sipped on a craft beer. Amelia checked on her phone and put it down on the table.

   “Has anyone heard from Sarah?”

   We all checked our phones. Claire frowned.

   “No, not even a text. I hope she got home alright.”

   Jane and Rose kissed briefly. Lizzie called Sarah and left a voicemail.

   “Hey Sarah, I hope you’re OK. We’re here at the pub. Please call me back. Bye.”

   She placed her phone on the table. Their roasts arrived hot and delicious. They dug in appreciating the crispy Yorkshire pudding and delicate meat that melted in the mouth. An hour later, they pushed their desserts plates forward and sighed. Amelia stood up and announced her next plan of the day.

   “Let’s go to the beach!”

   Claire joined her.

   “Yes! The sun is still out. Let’s enjoy the day.”

   Jane and Rose looked at each other.

   “Sorry guys, we have a film to watch.”

   They got up, put their coats on and hugged their friends.

   Amelia’s phone rang. She didn’t recognise the number, but felt compelled to answer it.

   “Hello?”

   She cradled the phone under her chin while pulling on her pea coat.

   “OMG! You have to come now!”

   “Come where? Who are you?”

   The caller sobbed uncontrollably.

   “It’s Helen, Sarah’s flatmate. Was Sarah’s flatmate.” Claire tapped her on the shoulder. Amelia mouthed ‘wait’ to her. “You need to come over now.”

   “Why Helen? Is she OK?”

   “She’s …She’s dead.”

   Amelia sat back down in her chair.

   “What do you mean ‘she’s dead’?”

   “Just come now.”

   She hung up leaving Amelia feeling bereft.

  

   Amelia and Claire huddled outside Sarah’s flat crying over each other’s shoulders. A short slim man with dark cropped hair approached them.

   “I’m DS Scott. DI York informed me that you were friends with Miss Blake.”

   Amelia took a deep breath before speaking.

   “Yes, we were.”

   “Alright. We’ve contacted her family. They’re on their way. If you’d like to join me to the police station, I’d like to take a statement from you too.”

   “Of course.”

   They rode in his black BMW in silence. The loss of their best friend weighed down on them as they gave their statements. Claire noticed a picture that was peeking out of a folder named Blake, S.

   “Um, is that Sarah’s face?”

   DS Scott closed his eyes and swore under his breath.

   “Yes, it is.”

   “Can we see it?”

   “I’m not allowed to do that, madam.”

   She pulled an arm around Amelia.

   “Please, this would be the last time we would have see her.”

   He pulled out a packet of Marlboro’s, removed one cigarette and lit it. Smoke circled around them making the glaring lights hazy. He pushed the folder towards them.

   “Don’t open the file. Just pull out the picture.”

   Amelia looked at Claire. She looked back at Amelia. They both leant forward with an index finger and coaxed the picture out. Amelia pulled back and muffled a scream with her hands. Claire was shaking, too in shock to say anything. They hugged each other and looked at the picture again.  

   “What…what is that?”

   Amelia pointed at Sarah’s gaping mouth. DS Scott dragged a couple more times on the cigarette and threw the bud into a half drunk cup of tea.

   “That is a black rose. Do you know the significance of it?”

   “No, I don’t.”

  “It’s a symbol of death and mortality. Or even hatred. Did she have any enemies?”

   They looked at each other again. Claire seemed to have found her words.

  “No, not really. Friends argue and get back together, you know. Nothing serious.”

   He nodded.

   “I see. Thank you ladies. If I have any more questions, I’ll give you a call.”

   “Thank you detective.”

  

   Amelia was wide awake at 1AM. All she could see was the pale face of Sarah, eyes open and her mouth filled with a single black rose. She could feel the thorns cut at her throat. The bitter taste of the petals. The cold dead eyes of her friend.

  

 

  

  

  

  

Friday Night Frights 12

                                                           Chapter 12

   In a curtained corner of the hospital, Billie eyed up the red headed doctor who was sewing up the gash in his shoulder.

   “You’re lucky Mr Turner, the cut is five millimetres away from damaging the nerves around your shoulder bone.”

   “I’m lucky you’re my doctor.”

   She smiled as she cut the thread. Marc snickered on a chair next to him. He moved closer to look at the stiches.

   “What’s the damage?”

   She placed her tools on a metal tray.

   “Twelve inches and a permanent scar.”

   Billie pulled his arm gently into his shirt’s sleeve.

   “That’s not too bad, Billie. It could’ve been much worse.”

   He nodded and made a note of the doctor’s name badge.

   “Doctor Thorne, is that your real name?”

   “It certainly is.”

   “Will you join me for a coffee?”

   “Get yourself another doctor and you’ve got yourself a deal.”

   He held his hand out. They shook hands. Billie pulled her closer smelling lavender on her wrist.

   “What’s your name?”

   “Scarlet, Mr Turner.”

   “Call me Billie.”

 

   Four floors above, an alarm brought nurses and a police officer who was standing guard at the door running into the room searching for the gunshot patient who was there only an hour earlier. The bed was bare and the covers pushed aside. Several wires were tangled between the sheets and the bed railings. The window was open letting in a fresh breeze over the chaos in the room. A trail of blood stained the sheets, the floor and dripped from the window sill. The curtains billowed around a brightening sky which glinted at a pair of silver scissors in an evidence bag.

 

 

Friday Night Frights 11

                                                                Chapter 11

   Sweat trickled down Billie’s forehead and blinded his left eye. This is it. He’s going to die. Taken down by a psychopath who has a fascination with blue eyes. Heather shoved his sock back into his mouth.

   “Are you comfortable?” He muffled out an answer. “Those eyes will be mine in no time.” He turned his head hoping that it was going to be a painless death, but in reality, this was going to be the worst thing he’ll ever go through.

   A large shadow blocked the light streaming through the white curtain. She stopped and looked up. It passed and she returned to her favourite pet. Billie wriggled towards the side table where she placed the scissors. He grabbed them with this left hand and aimed them at her neck. She turned around and laughed at him.

   “Do you really think that you’re going to kill me?”

   He spat the sock at her.

   “I’ll try my best.”

   They wrestled for the scissors taking turns jabbing each other in the process. Billie found himself sliding off the bed and falling with a loud thump on the floorboards. He screamed out loud when Heather shoved the scissors into his shoulder.

  A loud crash broke through the large bedroom window. A large figure wrapped in a white curtain wrestled out of it.

   “Stop! Don’t you dare move!” Billie and Heather froze. Marc winced at the shard of glass wedged in his thigh. He pointed his gun at Heather. “Get up. Move away from him.”

   She stood up and moved slowly towards her vanity where she kept a large pair of sewing scissors. Billie slowly pulled out the scissors lodged in his shoulder. Marc approached him and helped him sit up.

   “Are you OK?”

   He winced at the bleeding gash.

   “I will be.”

   Heather removed the large sewing scissors from the top drawer at her vanity and ran towards Marc holding them high and aiming for his neck. Billie reached for the discarded scissors and tried to push his friend away.

   “Get out of the way!”

   He saw Heather moving in slow motion towards him. She fell towards him as he pulled the trigger. The large scissors missed him by an inch. A splatter of blood marked the pure whiteness of the room.  

 

The Illusion Of Being A Writer

Taking a closer look at being a writer and how other people see me as a writer is one big clash of an illusion which almost feels like being sucked into a giant black hole.

Illusion 1:

Being a writer and loosing myself into a fantastical world is the happiest place I find myself in. The ultimate goal of being published and doing this for a living sometimes feels like being in a hamster wheel while trying to catch passing clouds. In reality, the act of writing is the happiest place.

Illusion 2:

This is the bigger bubble that surrounds the hamster wheel which is other people's opinions and ideas on how I should act or behave as a writer. That also includes the endless criticisms of why I'm not published yet, how I should write, what I should write and why I'm not writing at every minute of the day. 

This puts tremendous pressure on the cracking hamster wheel on needing to succeed right now. Occasionally, I find that hamster bursting straight through into oblivion and floating around outer space, while gently being nudged around by astroids. 

The illusion of bring a writer feels like vibrating molecules trying so hard to be solid. 

Breaking out of these illusions starts with writing for the love of writing and letting the other illusion flow away, and bounce back at the criticisms. Sometimes not paying attention to it disintegrates the illusion.

There are times doing that is really hard. Hold on to your authenticity. Write whatever you want to write. The illusions will float away like smoke on a mirror and all that's left is you.

Stay safe, take care of yourself. 

Wonder Woman XXX 

Friday Night Frights 10

                                                                          Chapter 10

   The hot water beat down on Heather's back. Last night was incredible. Dinner was delicious. The conversation was flowing. Billie was hers. 

   She turned the tap off and wrapped herself in a large white towel. In the bedroom, she dropped the towel and walked closer to Billie's figure. 

   "Are you comfortable?"

   "Untie me right now!"

   "No."

   She gagged him with one of his socks. From her wardrobe, she dressed in a pair of blue jeans and a white t-shirt. Her bare feet slapped against the wooden floorboards. Grabbing a pair of scissors, she approached him with glee. 

   He muffled through his gag while trying to break off the chain between the leather cuffs. 

   She pulled out the gag.

   "Any last words?"

   "You're dead!"

   "I doubt it."

   His phone rang from the inside of his pocket trousers, which were lying on the bedroom floor. Heather dropped the sock and answered the phone.

   "Hello?"

   "Where's Billie?"

   "And you are?"

   "Marc. Put him on the phone Heather."

   "How do you know who I am?"

   "He texted me last night to make sure that he's OK."

   "Not anymore..." 

4 Podcasts I'm Loving Right Now

Hi! Here are the 4 podcasts that I'm loving right now. I hope you love them too. If you are already listening to them, please let me know of other podcasts you think I might enjoy.

1. My Favourite Murder
Karen and Georgia are the hosts of this popular true crime podcast. They are funny, respectful when it comes to the victims and I can't stop listening to them. I don't know if they're best friends, but they sound like it. It's a weekly podcast and you can read the show notes, as well as the sources of the crime stories on their beautiful website.
Here is a link to the website:
https://myfavoritemurder.com/222-that-s-how-water-works/
You can listen to My Favourite Murder on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, Spotify and Player FM.

2. The Double Cleanse
I started listening to this podcast after watching way too many videos of James and Robert Welsh. James Welsh does skincare on YouTube and Robert Welsh does makeup on YouTube. Robert does Ghost Stories and Make Up on Mondays. I love watching him do his make up while telling us about ghost stories.They are twin brothers that are adorable and I love their content. You will love them too. The episodes are released on a weekly basis. They make me laugh so much. Here's a link to their podcast:
https://podtail.com/en/podcast/the-double-cleanse-podcast/
You can find them on iTunes, Podtail, Podbean, Spotify and Player FM.

3. The Micah Hanks Program
This program is a weekly podcast hosted by Micah Hanks. He discusses with his guests subjects like UFOs, ancient mysteries, cryptozoology, science fiction and much more. There's so much to ponder about on each episode that it's hard to stop listening to it. Whether you believe in aliens or big foot, this is a podcast I keep going back to.
Here's a link to his podcast:
https://micahhanks.com/podcast/
You can listen to the podcast on Apple Podcasts, Podbean, Stitcher and Tune In.

4. The Big Séance
This podcast is bi-monthly and hosted by the wonderful Patrick Keller. He has some interesting guests that talk about the paranormal, mediums, ghost stories and hauntings. There are many more topics he discusses that fascinate me. He has a funny laugh. The podcast is atmospheric and will pull you in immediately.
Here's a link to the podcast:
http://bigseancepodcast.com/
You can listen to it on Stitcher, Spotify, Apple Podcasts and Google Podcasts.

Unorthodox

Deborah Feldman's Unorthodox is an honest journey of a little girl trying to fit in a Hasidic community with all its rules and laws. As she grew up, and got married, she continued to question herself on her life and where it's taking her. 

With a young son, she took a poetry class at a college that accepted her in their adult learning program. She met new and interesting people that opened her eyes to a different world with all the freedoms she could ever want. I won't spoil it for you. She has had an interesting life that only a few people know of the ins and outs of the Hasidic community. 

I've related to her so much. I came from a Muslim background with its own rules and restrictions. I too craved that freedom that she talked about in the book. The freedom to choose my own husband, my own career, my own wardrobe and to wear it in public. To go out anytime I want. 

I think we would have been friends, hiding books under our beds and dreaming of an authentic life.

Friday Night Frights 9

Chapter 9

   

   The left tap sputtered and trickled small drops of water into the sink. Bracing himself for the cold water, Billie turned the cold tap clockwise. He rinsed the soap off his hands and dried them on his jeans. Looking up, he opened the medicine cabinet. There was a basic first aid kit, paracetamol, cold medicine, a small box of tampons, anti-septic cream, a bottle of Listerine and a box of plastic gloves. He closed it and walked out of the bathroom.

   
   In the kitchen, Heather was boiling spaghetti and frying veggies with minced meat. A bottle of Chianti was opened an hour earlier and was chilling in the fridge. Billie wrapped his arms around her and kissed the nape of her neck.

   
   “Mmm, you smell so good.”

   
   “I always smell so good.”

   
   He smiled and opened the fridge door. She removed the spaghetti and frying pan off the heat.

   
   “Dinner is ready.”

   
   “I’m ravished.”

   
   She forked out a small amount of spaghetti and spread minced meat and veg on top. Billie poured the wine and they ate on her bedroom balcony. The only room in the flat with a view. When they were done eating, she placed the plates in the sink. Billie searched her bedroom for clues of anything strange or suspicious, but found nothing. He did notice something unusual compared to a normal lived in home. It was super clean. All the surfaces gleamed and shined. There wasn’t a speck of dust. When he heard her footsteps, he turned around and found her in a blue lace lingerie set.

   
   “You’re so sexy, Heather.”

  
    She moved closer to him and started unbuttoning his shirt.

  
    “You thrill me, Billie. Stay tonight, and you won’t regret it.”

   
   “I’m right here.”

   
   He kissed her deeply. Her fingers dung painfully into his crouch. He liked it. With one hand, he unhooked her bra. He was in deep. That night, he lost himself completely in her.