What does toxic positivity actually mean?
From the Urban Dictionary, toxic positivity is the belief that, "if you just stay positive, you will overcome any obstacle," to such a degree that you invalidate natural emotional responses and the person having those feelings.
https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Toxic%20Positivity
https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Toxic%20Positivity
I've had my dose of toxic positivity in my almost 39 years of life. At home it was, "just smile everything is going to be OK," at school it was, "you have nothing to be sad about, you have everything you need," at uni it was, "just have fun you're young," at work it was, "you have nothing to complain about, be happy, at least this that or other."
None of the above made me feel better, grieve faster, heal quicker or feel better about my life while drowning myself in gratitude.
Acknowledging my feelings, sitting with them and being OK with not being OK made me feel a lot better. I know I'm not the only one who has experienced toxic positivity, whether it was with good intentions or maliciously.
I'm sure you've experienced this during lockdown. Please don't invalidate what you're going through just because you're doing your bit by being at home.
The sticky sweet even sickly positivity can on the surface seem harmless, but once you're flailing on the fly trap, unable to move due to pushing down all your feelings, all the time and wondering why filling yourself with, "good vibes only", didn't work, you succumb to depression or what you were going through.
Looking after your mental health is really important. Whether you spend a day filled with self-care or self-love or sit with yourself for a few minutes everyday, your emotions are valid. You are valid. You are worth it. All your emotions are valid.
I'm not an expert on mental health. I hope you're well and are staying safe.
Wonder Woman XXX 💜
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